Rhyme Time!

Okay, so this is kinda stupid, but I thought I’d share it anyway. My Sweet Baby and I use text-messaging a lot.  A whole lot.  People that have never grasped the benefits of texting have never been at a car lot doing a radio station remote for three hours.  See, in addition to killing time in a non-distracting way, it also makes communication easier and more discreet.  Nobody wants to see a jock (that’s what radio people call themselves) chatting away with a phone to his/her ear for long periods at a time.  And make no mistake:  over-texting and fiddling with your phone still pisses some people right off, so when in a public setting, please…use discretion.

Okay, there’s that.  Now on with the meat of this story.  Heidi (my Sweet Baby) had texted me to see if I would pick up Taco Bell on the way home.  She ended with “Okay?”  I responded with “Okay.”  Then, as they tend to do with silly people, things…escalated.  Here, then, is a screenshot of our first salvo.  Heidi is in yellow, I’m blue.

So it begins...

So it begins…

See what’s happening?  She starts by rhyming with “okay.”  Then I return fire. And keep going…

There it is.  She dropped the "gay" bomb.  It was so on...

There it is. She dropped the “gay” bomb. It was so on…

There really aren’t any rules.  It’s all free-association, and borderline rhymes still count.  (Much like when Shaquille O’Neal tries to rap.)  Heidi started getting momentum.

Too far?  TOO FAR?!?!  THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS "TOO FAR!"

Too far? TOO FAR?!?! THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS “TOO FAR!”

Pleased with herself, she continued to press…but I had an ace up my sleeve.

"HA!" INDEED!

“HA!” INDEED!

See that?  Todich, Ray?  That’s a reference to our friend Ray.  His last name is “Todich.”  See what I did there?  Yeah. It was a masterstroke, and my Sweet Baby doffed her hat and knelt in my direction.  BUT WAIT…like the Terminator, Jason Vorhees, and Michael Myers, Heidi stood back up for one last scare.

So you know, her kids are my kids, too.  Just wanted to clarify that.

So you know, her kids are my kids, too. Just wanted to clarify that.

Every. Day. In. May.  Boo-ya.  Game, set, match. Natch. I’d offer a light, but I don’t have a match.  Too much thatch.  GOD HELP ME I CAN’T STOP!! Pumpkin patch. Down the hatch.  SOMEONE HELP!! Flip the latch.  Nice catch!  GAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!