I been thinkin’…

Before you start, yes, I know that the title is grammatically incorrect.  I’m trying to sound like a man of the people, you see.  Don’t wanna come acrost (see what I did there?) as some high-falutin’ college boy. 

Anyway, I had some more random thoughts.  They’re not grouped by category, rather it’s ’bout to get stream-of-consciousness up in this piece, y’all! (Am I sounding more grounded?  ‘Cause to me it sounds funny.)

1. No one I know is a pedophile. Yet everybody wants to know how old Carly and Sam are (from the hit show iCarly.)

2. Jennette McCurdy DOB: 6/26/1992

Seriously, the second image that showed up in a Google image search for "pedophile."

3.”Ape Shit” is not a great analogy for something being messed-up and/or crazy.  A better analogy would be “Carrot Top cutting up a baby.”  Example: “Jeez, you should’ve seen Jerry last night after the union meeting.  He went all Carrot Top cutting up a baby!” Perhaps it could be abbreviated CaTCUB.  “The boss went CaTCUB when he found me pooping in the trash can.”

Sleep tight.

4. Remember the show “Speed Buggy?” It was a Hanna-Barbera cartoon that employed the time-tested formula of a bunch of youngsters travelling the country getting into adventures and solving crime.  It was basically “Scooby Doo!” but instead of a giant, somewhat expressive Great Dane, it was a somewhat expressive sentient dune buggy that provided the comic relief. Oh, and instead of a stoner burnout buddy, Speed Buggy’s pal was a mildy retarded mechanic.  Or something. But one thought has stuck with me since childhood concerning Speedy and the gang: why the fuck do you need three people (three!) to ride around in a car that can drive itself?  Jesus, the entire  universe in the “Cars” movies operated without a single human in sight!  Need somebody to wipe your ass, Speedy?  Good thing you’ve got Fred, Daphne, and…oh.  Sorry.  Wrong cartoon.

Not pictured: Velma.

5. Speaking of “Cars,” I wonder how many other people have wondered about the abscence of humans in the post-apocalyptic world of Lightning McQueen and company?  The answer is as simple as it is bleak.  “Cars” happens about thirty years after the events in “Maximum Overdrive.”  Sorry, gang…Emilio doesn’t make it.



3 thoughts on “I been thinkin’…

  1. Carrot is a scary lookin mo fo these days….no really. Thanks Turner, that image will haunt me tonight in my dreams.


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