I Need Stats…STAT!!

A quick post since, you know…I haven’t done one in forever.  I need to give a tip o’ the hat to my good pal and fabulous international dream-expert superstar Lauri Loewenberg, whose site (ahem..lauriloewenberg.com) get visits from everybody, all the time.  Seriously, since today’s blog is about stats consider this: Lauri’s website gets enough pageviews a day to account for every single man, woman, and marsupial on the damn planet visiting it twice daily.  Twice. (Okay, maybe I’m just guessing on those stats, but still…)

A large portion of Lauri’s webhits (literally million a minute.  Millions.) come from people searching her out after seeing her expert dream analysis on shows like The View, The Today Show, Dr. Oz, and Adventure Time!  Okay, not Adventure Time, although if an animated rendering of Lauri showed up alongside Finn and Jake, my head would literally explode from the sheer awesomeness of it all.  The point is, her Facebook status yesterday was bemoaning the strange and, honestly, sexually deviant search terms entered into the likes of Google that ultimately brought people to her webpage. To test a, well, ahem…a theory of mine, I Googled “Lauri Loewenberg wearing a Slave Princess Leia bikini” and while I sadly did NOT find the requested images, I did ultimately find some killer new rock radio morning shows and a link to Lauri’s page.  See, kids?  Google works!

I think Ima hafta do another "page visit" if you know what I mean.

This whole thing led me to recall a blog I did a while ago on the strange search terms people have used to find MY silly little blog.  I hate to brag, but literally dozens of people have read this page.  Dozens.  And this morning, here’s what search terms have led people to my site:

It's nice to see that people have accepted that BBT isn't funny and are now more concerned with WHY it isn't funny.

“Short Pecker Awards?”  Really?  Well, shucks…I guess it’s a pleasure just to be nominated.

Another cool feature that WordPress gives bloggers is a measure of where in the world (literally) your page hits are coming from.  It’s pretty cool to see that two people from Turkey looked at my site today.  I credit that to Keyser Soze and company keeping tabs on me. (Special message to Mr. Soze: I’ll never forget what you did for me back in the fall of 2004.  Everything’s fine now, and the new penis works great!)

Hey, Greenland...what am I, chopped herring?!?

I guess in closing I’ll just say, well, thanks.  Thanks for checking me out, and reminding me just how small the world truly is nowadays.  Not as small as my pecker, mind you, but still…